Where: Slytherin 6th Year boys Dorms
Why: Malcolm finding something he had lost in there.
Rating: PG 13 For Language
Malcolm's head peeked into the sixth year dorm room. Finding it empty he quickly stepped inside with a small strut. Making his way towards Antonin's bed he gave a slight frown. His eyes darted around the bed, looking for something. "Where the fuck did he put it..." Sneering he fell to his knees, checking underneath the bed. His hand rested on Antonin's trunk for a bit before he opened it. Rummaging through for his lost DADA text book.
Antonin, coming back from dinner late, having hung back to talk to some friends he had in Ravenclaw, entered his dorm and he froze at the sight of Malcolm. His lip curled into a sneer and he said, "What are you doing here," his eyes followed to his open trunk which Malcolm was rummaging through. "In my trunk." he added stepping over to him standing a few feet from him.
Frustrated Malcolm slammed the trunk close and did not face Antonin just yet. "If would appear that I am looking for something." Standing up with his head lowered, he turned slowly. Hands out to show himself unarmed he glared at his former friend. "I thought you were smarter then this Antonin, oh wait...I believe I'm wrong about that." Shaking a few locks away from his face, he frowned. "Where's your whore?"
"Mind what you say Parkinsons" he spat, glaring at his ex-best friend. Raising his hands showing himself unarmed he sat on his bed, and muttered, "What have you lost, if you really were just looking for something you could have summoned it with you wand, I know this well, you have an ulterior motive, what is it?" he said choosing his words carefully, speaking slowly.
Malcolm put his hand to his chest, pretending to be shocked. "When don't I have an ulterior motive?" Mentally kicking himself for not using a summoning charm, he walked a bit away from the other man towards a side table. "I would appreciate if you do not call me Parkinson, our past friendship should give me a bit of respect." He spat out, fingering a few items on the side table. Eyes narrowed as he picked up a scrap of parchment.
"Why shouldn't I? Its what Regulus calls you, I think it suits you well." he said, eyeing his actions closely, while keeping a relax countenance and posture. Acting as if he wasn't worried at all, which he was. He may act tough, but Malcolm is still bigger than he is, and has been in school a year longer.
"Regulus is an asshole." He shrugged picking up another item. "Where's my defence against the dark arts book." Speaking in a bored manner, he raised a hand towards the foot of his bed. "I dropped it around there. What's this?" Shaking a vial he eyed his former friend. "You're not taking anything for medical purposes are you? I know Ivy's a whore but, I doubt she has any diseases." With a smirk he tossed the vial at Antonin.
"Hahaha real funny Malcolm." he said, catching the vial, and pocketing it. "I've been having nightmares lately, often. I've borrowed this from the school nurse, its a potion for dreamless sleep." he said, looking up gravely at Malcolm. His eyes had dark circles under them, and his eyes were blood shot and seemed drooped. He hadn't gotten a good nights sleep in over a week. Four hours maximum of combined sleep for him.
Malcolm frowned, seeming worried for his friend. Quickly he caught himself and shook his head. "Nightmares? Afraid Ivy's going to fuck Severus next?" He teased, trying to rid his facial expression of any hint of emotion for Antonin's health. "I would be frightened if I were you too. The next time you put your dick in Ivy, you may never have it function again."
Antonin stood, angered. "I told you to hold your tongue about Ivy Malcolm." he said, poking him in the chest. "I do not care how ever much you hate her for doing this to you, do not speak ill of her. Under stand?" Antonin continue practically spitting with emphasis and anger.
Malcolm smiled taking a step closer to him. "What are you going to do if I call her a whore one more time, Antonin?" Taking another step, he stood a few inches away from Antonin. Able to feel the closeness of his friend. Knowing it must have made Antonin very uncomfortable at the moment.
Cowering inside but holding firm to his position he spoke, "I will..." he said, but his voice faltered, he grew extremely hot under the collar when Malcolm was that close, he took a step back, and continued, "I do not want to hurt you Malcolm, but I will if I have to." He tried to seem still tough, and ready for a fight, but he wasn't.
another smile spread across Malcolm's face. He took a step forward, closing in on Antonin. Placing his hands on his friends shoulders. Leaning his head in, he kissed his friend. Not moving his mouth, just staying pressed against those lips for a few seconds. Pulling back he smirked. "You will never hurt me Antonin. Not physically anyway." He whispered against the man's mouth. Taking a step back he looked at his friend with his head tilted to the side.
Antonin, stood frozen, totally taken off his guard by his friends sudden action. His eyes were wide, as if in terror. Staring at Malcolm, breathless he said, "What the hell did you do that for?" he said, biting his bottom lip, and looking to the floor, his whole angered image vanished with Malcolm's kiss. He gulped hard and tried to look anywhere but at Malcolm.
Frowning Malcolm spoke softly. "You honestly don't know..." Shaking his head he sat down on Antonin's bed. Watching Antonin as he stared at the floor. Choosing his words carefully he kept his voice soft. "I know you will not hurt me, as I know that I will not hurt you. The reason I know this...is because of one truth. Do you know what that truth is?"
"N-No..." Antonin stuttered. That was the first time in his life he had ever stuttered, he had never been this nervous before, and he didn't like it. Gulping hard he turned to face Malcolm, the reason for his lowered head revealed, as his cheeks were scarlet. "What are you talking about Malcolm?" he asked again, afraid of the answer but at the same time, he felt there was nothing more thrilling in the world.
Malcolm ran his fingers through his hair. Feeling awkward about explaining this to his friend. Explaining something he thought Antonin should already know. "Antonin...how long have we known each other? No..." Taking a deep breath Malcolm stood up, placing his hands on his friends shoulders again. "We have feelings for each other, and it's not only friendship." He said it quickly, however, he was sure that the words gotten through. There was a reason they were so close friends.
"I know..." Antonin whispered, not looking in Malcolm's eyes. "Feelings we can not indulge in, I'm with Ivy now, and I am committed to her." He said, feeling thoroughly embarrassed, but still held his dignity. He went on to say, "You know very well I have never been committed to someone before, and I have no clue why I am to her, but I am. You were so horrid to her, but she is everything I look for in a girl. She's witty, charming, talkative, engaging and very beautiful. I won't leave her...but..I've had these feelings for you for such a long time, they just want to burst out, you know how much it is for me to resist kissing you right now, I want you, but I won't let myself have you." He sat on his bed, looking grave and defeated. He felt tired, more tired than he had ever felt in his entire life. He was torn, and emotionally spent. He let out a deep sigh and lay contemplating what to do.
Malcolm kept his back turned to his friend. Afraid of showing any emotion. "I know Antonin...I know." He whispered, smoothing out the front of his shirt. "I'm with Hannah. I will not leave her either. She is everything Ivy is not. She will not betray me. How can you be so sure that Ivy will not cheat on you? She's done it to Regulus and me." Pinching the bridge of his nose, he sighed. "I am a fool for kissing you. I will leave now. Forget this night." He took out his wand and held it tightly.
"Malcolm..." he whispered, pleadingly. "I do not wish for you to go..." he said standing. He placed a hand over Malcolm's which was clutching his wand, asking him to release it. He put his chin over Malcolm’s’ shoulder standing behind him. "I do not wish for you to go." he repeated, whispering into Malcolm’ ear and holding onto him from behind. "stay with me...please..." he pleaded, feeling alone, his feelings for Ivy becoming unsure, he did not want to lose her, but he wanted Malcolm so.
Malcolm lowered his head slightly, eyes closed. "Antonin...we can't be together the way we want to." Voice sounding a bit cracked, he wanted to pull away and embrace his friend all at the same time. Feeling his heart beat faster as the touch of Antonin's body began to register. Noticing how close they were. "All we have is our friendship." Licking his lips Malcolm took a step forward, Putting some space between them. "That is all we can have."
Antonin slumped onto his bed, defeated. He felt crushed, teased, and rejected.. He wanted to cry, like the baby he is. He may seem tough on the outside, but he is just a scared little boy on the inside. He sniffed to hold in his tear, his voice was shaky when he spoke, "Fine. Leave me, like I care. Friendship is all we have, so be it. Take what you need and go." he spat, and laid on his bed holding his pillow, his back to Malcolm, trying to hold back the tears welling in his eyes.
Why did he have to be such an asshole? Malcolm wanted nothing more then to crawl into that bed with him and hold him. Tell him that everything will be all right and kiss away his pain. Malcolm's heels clicked a few steps away from Antonin and froze. Fuck his mind shouted as he turned around. Walking back to Antonin he kneeled on the bed behind him. Wrapping his arms around his lost love, pulling him closer to his chest. Silently he held him, apologizing with his actions. Sorry for not confronting him sooner. If he had, they might be able to explore this aching feeling they were experiencing.
Antonin's eyes widened as he was held by Malcolm. He sat up and turned around, livid. "You...first, you kiss me. Then, you reject me, crush my feelings, and now you hold me as if you want me. Stop jerking me around!" he said, swinging back his hand and smacking Malcolm on the cheek with such force it hurt his hand. "Get out! You said you didn't want me, get out!”
With his nose flared, yet with a shock expression, Malcolm was speechless. Never did he think, his friend would have struck him so. He nearly fell off the bed and stood, his mouth set in an angry pout. Bringing his fingers to touch the reddening flesh. "There's a difference between wanting and being unable to have." He hissed. "I want you, but I cannot have you Antonin. You ballsy little fuck, I can't believe you hit me." He said coldly, glaring at him. "I am not jerking you around."
"Don't talk to me Malcolm, just take your book and go okay?" he said, he leaned over his bed and lifted the mattress, pulling out Malcolm's DADA book and handing it to him. Tears were now streaming down his face. "You have what you wanted now go." he said, taking his hanging and closing them. He laid on his bed, sobbing into his already damp pillow.
Swallowing a lump forming in his throat Malcolm turned and walked out of the room. Standing in the door way to say one last comment. "No, Antonin, I do not have what I want. I want you and that...I can never have." He closed the door behind him loudly and leaned against it. Taking in several breaths before he felt it safe to return to his own room. Holding back any tears he would have shed, making himself picture Antonin hovering over Ivy's naked body